Finance Gets Personal

After a year (on and off) of trying and two cycles of charting, I am finally pregnant!

I personally think that taking 50 mg of vitamin B6 to lengthen my luteal phase is what pushed things over the edge for us, but I can’t say for certain. Either way, I am 4 weeks and 5 days pregnant (you get two weeks “extra credit” for the time between your last period and ovulation). My due date is April 10.

While we’re ecstatic and relieved that things occurred naturally, I didn’t realize that my fears about being unable to conceive were about to be replaced by a bigger fear: fear of miscarriage.

Approximately 25% of known pregnancies end in miscarriage, which is most common in the first trimester (especially the first part of the first trimester). Knowing this, we haven’t told anyone except my stepson about the pregnancy, and I’m regretting doing even that.

I’m feeling a little bit better these past few days though because I asked my regular doctor to give me a blood workup to check my progesterone levels (low progesterone is often a cause of short luteal phases, and can result in miscarriage if you don’t get progesterone supplements early in pregnancy). Luckily, all my levels are good so far. We go in for my first prenatal appointment next Thursday, and hopefully we will be able to see the heartbeat on an early ultrasound. If so, I’ll feel more comfortable telling our families at that point (plus, I can’t expect a 10-year-old to keep a secret very long!).

I also need to wrestle with the decision of whether to continue taking my antidepressant during pregnancy, and am already working hard on kicking my caffeine habit.

My symptoms so far include extreme fatigue (which could also be related to sudden lack of caffeine), tender and larger breasts, increased sense of smell, more frequent urination and backache. I haven’t had any food aversions or nausea, but those symptoms become more common in week 6.

For those of you who have been pregnant before, how did you keep yourself from becoming anxious about miscarrying (or were you able to)? And, random question, if I am 4 weeks and 5 days pregnant, am I already considered 5 weeks (because I’m in the fifth week), or am I considered 5 weeks at the end of the fifth week?

Here is my chart from the successful cycle. You’ll notice there is a temperature drop today, which is freaking me out a little - I might have to stop temping at some point, just to avoid the anxiety

Well, we tried our hardest, but there was no BFP (big fat positive) pregnancy test to be had at the end of my first cycle of charting.

I did learn some interesting things about my body through recording my basal body temperature and other fertility signs though. For instance, I ovulated on day 16 of my cycle - slightly later than the day 14 average. And, more importantly, my luteal phase between ovulation and menstruation was only 9 days, for a total cycle length of 25 days. That is bad news, girlies (and boys who haven’t already clicked the “back” button)!

The average luteal phase is between 12-16 days, and 9 days is not long enough for an embryo to implant in the utereus before the lining starts to shed. A short luteal phase can be a sign of low progesterone, the hormone that takes over once you ovulate. Low progesterone can also lead to early miscarriages in those who do achieve pregnancy.

Luckily, this problem is usually easily treated - I just need to go see my OB/GYN and have some tests run.

But wouldn’t you know it, there’s a small problem: My insurance doesn’t cover infertility treatment!!!!!!

Now, I’m not (quite) freaking out yet, because I want to see what my cycle does this month. Although your luteal phase doesn’t usually change from month to month, I want to make sure the first time wasn’t an anomaly. Meanwhile, I’m taking 50 mg of vitamin B6, which is supposed to be a natural way of lengthening your luteal phase.

But the lack of insurance coverage ticks me off, and I’m also ticked at myself for not thinking about it sooner. You see, I only use my employer’s health insurance plan because it’s about $100 less per year than being added to my husband’s insurance, which does cover infertility, and also has a slightly lower co-pay. I can switch to my husband’s insurance plan, but without a major life event (like, ahem, having a baby) I won’t be able to do so until January 1. And since we’ve already used all of our health care flex savings for the year, I’m not very flush with medical money at the moment.

So, my current plan is to take my vitamins, have well-timed sex and try not to think too much about it until that bitchy old hag makes her next visit.

Just when I’ve finally gotten down all the couponing and online deal-finding acronyms (BOGO, YMMV, B&M, etc.), it turns out there’s a whole new set of acronyms to learn when it comes to getting pregnant (officially: Trying to Conceive, or TTC).

Yes, that’s right. My husband and I are trying to make a baby (Ew! - I know).

Well, technically, we’ve been “trying” on and off for a year with no success, but with not much of a methodology either. So this month I’m turning myself into a human science experiment with charting, basal body temperatures, cervical fluid and the like.

Little did a know there would be a special vocabulary for this.

Browse some iVillage and The Bump message boards, and you’ll come across posts like this:

This 2WW is killing me! I think I might cave and POAS in the morning. I know it’s early, but I’m driving myself crazy. Just wanted to share!

Translation: This two week wait between ovulating and finding out if I’m pregnant is killing me! I think I might cave and pee on a stick (take a pregnancy test) in the morning. I know it’s too early, but I’m driving myself crazy. Just wanted to share!

I’ve also learned that AF (Aunt Flo) is commonly referred to as an “old hag,” women with a BFP (big fat positive) pregnancy test will sprinkle those still trying with “baby dust” and there are BD (baby dancing - having sex to try to get pregnant) Olympians (twice a day?). O-kay.

I’m hoping this won’t take too long now that I’m being all scientific about it. I’m giving it four months before I start freaking out that I’m infertile. Sprinkle me with some baby dust or something.

There’s been a lot of stuff going on in Finance Gets Personal land, so much so that there hasn’t been much time to write!

So, let’s get caught up, shall we?

The Vacuum
While on the hunt for a cheap vacuum, we managed to break the vacuum we’d been borrowing from my in-laws. Can you freaking believe that?!?! We think we may have figured out why we are the vacuum serial killers though.

My stepson has a lot of Webkinz, which are little stuffed animals that you can also play with online (or something - I’m too old to understand this crap). Sometimes, our dog kidnaps one and it becomes his new toy. AND, since our dog destroys all his toys, we’ve discovered that Webkinz have a little packet of tiny plastic balls inside of their stuffing. The packet gets chewed open, and tiny plastic balls are lodged in the carpet throughout the house. We think that when the vacuum sucks these up, they melt and cause major problems!

So, no more Webkinz for the dog!

We went to Target to buy the in-laws one of the vacuums that was on clearance there for $65, but when we called to see which one they wanted, they insisted that they don’t need one. They’ve been replacing all their carpet with hardwood, and only their bedroom is left. They’re planning on replacing that within the next month, so I guess we got lucky!

So, back to our vacuum. While I last wrote that we were going to buy a cheap one and use the American Express in order to extend the warranty, we ended up getting the Dyson Animal I wanted through Frys. It’s refurbished, and I’m not sure if the warranty extends beyond six months, but it was only $206 (including taxes and shipping), included all the attachments and arrived just like new. I LOVE it so far!

My Sister’s Financial Peace University Classes
I’m really not sure how this is going because we haven’t talked about it since the first class. But I’m going to be seeing her tomorrow and hopefully will find out more then. As I reported earlier, her husband is going with her and they are at least halfway through baby step 1 ($1,000 emergency fund).

Layoffs at My Husband’s Company
While the layoffs were originally scheduled for March 12, that date was moved up to March 6 (today). But they found out yesterday that his group was not affected by the layoffs at all! So that is wonderful news!

Meanwhile, my company announced that we probably won’t be having quarterly bonuses this year and were getting 3% raises across the board (we wouldn’t have gotten anything, but they felt bad about not giving people raises last year either). However, we are currently SWAMPED with new projects, and should be until at least June.

So, it looks like the ramen noodle budget will not be necessary. We’ll probably be moving most of the money we have in savings (beyond the $1,000 emergency fund) to the second mortgage balance in the next week or two.

Taxes
By stalking SlickDeals.net, I found a free download of H&R Block Tax Cut with free e-filing and used it to prepare our federal taxes. We’ve already received our $635 refund and can now submit our state return, which will swallow that $635 plus another $55. Did I mention we have to file two state returns? I’ll be doing the second one on paper so we don’t have to pay to download an additional state (not sure how we’ll come out on that one, though last year we got back $130 or so).

I guess I should get on that, so things don’t turn out like last year.

What I’ve Been Doing for the Past Month (i.e., Spending Money)
I’ve probably mentioned this before, but I have a “life list” of things to do before I die. Some of them (play blackjack in a casino) are easier and less expensive than others (own a photography studio). One of the items on my list is to have an Oscar party. So, I did!

Of course, being the freak I am, everything had to be on theme. I had food and drinks for each movie, a ballot contest with prizes, a red carpet and decorations, gift bags (hello, drugstore stockpile!), paparazzi, etc. It was fun, but expensive (for example, The Curious Case of Benjamin Button featured caviar with creme fraiche on toast points and vodka shots)!

Then, I had a business trip (love getting mileage reimbursement for traveling to the airport, by the way) and party-planning for my stepson’s upcoming birthday (they’re going to a movie theater to see “Mall Cop” and play laser tag).

So, things have been busy! But I think we’re all caught up now, and I look forward to posting more soon.

As 2008 comes to a close, I’d like to share the progress we’ve made on our goals to get out of debt and change careers.

We started the year with $3,479 in low-interest credit card debt, $6,623 in car loans, $14,401 in student loans, $35,179 on our second mortgage and $139,604 on our first mortgage. Our goal was to pay off everything but the first and second mortgages, and we did! In total, we paid off $26,951 in debt this year with an income of approximately $105,000 before taxes. In 2007, we paid off $22,100 in debt, so that’s a slight increase.

I feel we could have done even better had we not had a multitude of home repairs throughout the year (sump pump replacement: $172, heat pump replacement: $3,467, hot water heater replacement: $647, exterior house painting: $2,992, termite treatment: $650).

Our goal for 2009 is to pay off our second mortgage, which currently has a balance of $34,806. We’re already $1,812 closer to that goal due to the remainder of my $5,000 Christmas bonus that is currently sitting in our emergency fund. Since there’s a possibility my husband will be laid off in the first quarter, we’ll be directing our extra debt payments into savings until the layoffs occur, then transfer that money to our second mortgage once we’re (hopefully) in the clear. While my husband would like a new career, we’d prefer to wait until after our debt is paid off (note to husband’s company: could you please pencil in some fat voluntary separation packages for 2012?)!

We’re also trying to get pregnant this year and limit our baby expenses to what’s available in our current budget. Additionally, my husband has the goal of finishing our basement himself for $3,000-$4,000, which we are budgeting $150 per paycheck toward beginning in January.

On a personal note, I’d like to thank everyone for reading this blog. When I started writing in February, I wasn’t sure anyone would be interested in the thoughts of an anonymous office drone with big dreams, but I’ve been pleasantly surprised.

Happy New Year.

Yes, it’s already November 10! I suppose my procrastination has something to do with the fact that my net worth is continuing to fall despite my extra debt payments…

Net Worth as of October 3: $67,364
Net Worth as of November 1: $64,030

Here are October’s highlights:

• At the beginning of the month, I discovered the concept of the anti-charity. With that in mind, I decided that I would contribute $25 to the National Rifle Association if I did not maintain a calorie intake of 1679 each day for the month of October (which would put me on track to lose one pound a week). Well, I did very well for the first half of the month, but then I started sliding. And once I knew I’d gone over my limit for two days, I figured there was no point continuing (stomach’s logic, not brain’s). So, did I donate $25 to the NRA? No, I couldn’t bring myself to do it. Yes, I know - I’m a bastard. In the future, I think daily rewards/punishment might be more effective (i.e., $5 for every day I go over). Along with greater accountability.
• Fourth grade tackle football turned out to be a big expense, especially since my stepson broke his finger at practice. Luckily, we managed to finish the season without too much more financial damage - other than the pizza party where we got screwed by the whole “split the check” thing and *probably* ended up paying the coaches’ and other parents’ bar tab (never actually got to see the bill because there were so many people - and we drank Coke, people!).
• I was incredibly excited when gas fell below $3 a gallon on October 2, but now it’s down to $1.65. That has definitely helped with the budget!
• October was a three paycheck month, which means that I was able to get a head start on Christmas shopping. However, I’ll be transferring prescriptions for gift cards like crazy for the next two months to supplement our Christmas budget, which has run into a little snag - I forgot about our $588 personal property tax bill that’s due by the end of the year (how do I always forget about that when it happens every year?!?).
• Oh, and there is one other possible reason why our Christmas budget is tight. After spending a lot of money on clothes and home organization, I’m now operating on a cash envelope system again.
• One other reason for the budget shortfall: I think I got ripped off when I had my brakes done. At least, that’s the only logical explanation I can come up with for why it ended up costing nearly three times what my coupon was for.
• Despite all that, my student loan balance is down to $4,280 and will be paid off by the end of the year.

Our retirement accounts are bringing down our net worth, so I’m now going to take this opportunity to remind myself that we paid off $2,754 in debt last month. Yea!

Photo Credit: Good Wine, Bad Economy by MotherPie, used under Creative Commons licensing.

Sometimes I think parents wouldn’t sign their kids up for so many sports and activities if they knew how much they would actually end up spending when it’s all said and done.

Take our family’s expenses for my stepson’s fourth grade tackle football team, for instance.

It starts with an up front cost of $180. While this seems steep, it pays for the uniform, mouth guard, use of the football pads/helmet and pays the referees. Plus, NO FUNDRAISER! So, not too bad so far. But it does still sting a little.

First day of football practice: I get a frantic call on my way home from work. “We need to get some cleats for practice tonight. We totally forgot!” Do last year’s still fit? I tried to buy them a little big. “No. Can you stop and get some?” Cost of Cleats: $19.99 at WalMart.

Second week of practice: “Coach says we need to buy some practice pants or I won’t be able to practice with pads.” Well, when is he going to get us the uniform pants? I thought we were just waiting for those to come in. “No, I think everyone else bought practice pants because they were on sale for $10 at sign-ups.” Well, your mom took you to sign ups and she never said anything about that. I thought everyone else was wearing their uniform pants. They all bought a pair of practice pants at sign ups? “I guess so.” Cost of Practice Pants: $20 at Dick’s Sporting Goods.

Third week of practice: Do we need to get him a cup? He should be wearing a cup, right? “Um, yeah, I think so.” Where do you buy a cup at? “Dick’s?” Cost of Junior Cup and Underwear: $16 at Dick’s Sporting Goods.

The next practice: Are you wearing your cup? “No, it’s too big! I can’t run with that thing on!” Well, you need to wear it. You’re going to hurt yourself. “Can you buy me a smaller one?” No, that one is fine! Besides, the only smaller one they have is the ‘pee wee’ cup.

An hour and a half before the first game: (Crying) “I forgot to bring my cup over to mom’s house. Can you guys bring it to the game? And I can’t find my underwear either!” After searching for the underwear… We can’t find your underwear, and we haven’t seen it since the last time you went over to your mom’s. Are you sure you didn’t leave it there? Have you not been wearing your cup at practice since then? “How can I wear my cup when I can’t find the underwear? She hasn’t seen it either!” Cost of Pee Wee Cup and Underwear: $16 at Dick’s Sporting Goods.

Half an hour before the first game: “Where are my black socks? I don’t have any black socks!” You were wearing black socks when you went over to your mom’s on Friday. Why didn’t you just bring those? “Well, I did, but coach says we were supposed to buy black football socks that go up to your knees.” What, that’s not included this year? Last year, it was included. Cost of Football Socks: $15 at Dick’s Sporting Goods.

Two hours before the second game, which has been rained out: Hurry, let’s run inside the school for football pictures! “Which package are we going to get this year?” I don’t know, let me look at the form. I don’t remember what’s included with the $180. Go stand over there with the team and I’ll give it to you in a minute. (Thirty seconds later) “They said I need to bring the form with me.” Argh, hold on! Here, we’ll just get this package. Cost of Pictures: $19.99

Last Saturday night, at a team pizza party: “OK guys, I’m going to buy three pizzas and three pitchers for the kids, what does everyone else want to do? Have you eaten? We could order four pizzas and a couple pitchers of soda for the adults and split it between the 15 families?” That sounds fine. My husband and I each have two pieces of pizza and some Coke, while some of the other parents split pitchers of beer. “OK, guys, the bill is $270. So, let’s call it $20 per person.” (Afterward) Did he split up the kid and adult orders? Did we just pay for everyone’s beer? I think we just got screwed! Cost of Pizza Party: $20, Plus $2 in Quarters for Arcade Games

Tuesday night: “I hurt my pinkie at football practice. Coach said to put some ice on it.” OK, well it does look a little swollen. Put a baggie of ice inside a washcloth and sleep with it on your hand tonight.

Wednesday night: (Crying) “My head hurts!” OK, let’s see if your grandma has any headache medicine you can have. “Can you see if she has any medical tape so I can tape my finger? Coach said I should tape my finger.” We have some medical tape at home. We’ll do it then. Is it still swollen? Does it hurt? “Yes, the nurse said I should probably go to the doctor.” You went to see the nurse today? “Yes, three times.” How come she didn’t call? Did she send a note home or anything? “No. She said there was nothing she could do, that I should probably go to the doctor because it hurts really bad.”

Ten minutes ago: “The doctor says his pinkie is broken. They probably won’t do anything about it, but we need to buy a splint and make an appointment with an orthopedic surgeon.” Well, is he still going to play? “Yes, if we use a splint and tape his three fingers together.” How is he going to be able to catch the ball? “I don’t know.” Are you sure he should play? “No.” Cost of Doctor Co-Pay and Splint: $26; Cost of Upcoming Specialist Co-Pay: $35; Other Upcoming Costs: TBD!

And we’re only halfway through the season!

Photo Credit: Little Chargers by Brit., used under Creative Commons licensing.

Wow, I feel super old.

This morning when I dropped my stepson off at elementary school, there were some fourth or fifth grade boys outside discussing which cell phone company they would choose if it were up to them. 

“Sprint’s OK, but I think I’d pick AT&T.” 

Crazy! 

But consider this:  According to a study from the University of Alabama at Birmingham, one-third of children age 10-12 own a cell phone.  And another market research firm recently estimated that 54% of 8-12-year-olds will own a cell phone by 2009.

Whatever happened to tying up the home phone line for hours?  For free!

Photo Credit: 365:027 by Groeten_Uit_Parbo, used under Creative Commons licensing

On Thursday, I wrote about my first money memories and how they may have affected the way I handle money today. I found that I was pretty oblivious about money as a child, even though my grandparents distinctly remember me telling them as a 2- or 3-year-old that “Daddy works to buy me gum.”

I had always thought my family was rich because we had a swimming pool, but around eigth grade, I started seeing little signs that my parents might actually be in debt. Here are some of my money memories from eighth grade through high school:

In eighth or ninth grade, I won second place in an Optimist essay contest on “Freedom: A Right or a Privilege?” (I think I said it was a right - after all, I felt entitled to pretty much everything). I needed something to wear to the awards ceremony, so my mom took me to The Jones Store to get a new shirt. She usually steered me in the direction of the sales rack, but on this day, I picked out a $30 long-sleeved ribbed Levi’s shirt with silver buttons. My mom said, “$30 is kind of expensive for a shirt. Are you sure you want it?” Of course, I said I had to have it. But after the awards ceremony, I noticed that it didn’t fit quite right - the sleeves were too long, it was a little too tight, etc., and I didn’t really like it. But I kept wearing it so my mom wouldn’t know. Even today, I have a hard time parting with clothes I spent too much money on. There has been a $140 J. Crew dress hanging in my closet for at least three years that I’ve never worn because it doesn’t fit quite right (it’s going in the garage sale).

For Easter, my sister and I always got a new dress to wear to church. One year, I needed new shoes to wear with my dress, but my mom told me we could only buy them if we got them at Sears. I believe now (and I think realized back then, because I felt really guilty about those shoes) that this was because her other department store cards were maxed out.

My junior year of high school, my mom took me shopping for a prom dress (yes, my mom took me shopping a lot). I chose a long, black velvet dress with an empire waist and a sheer black overlay from Dillards for $120. I remember that when we came back home, my mom hung it up in my closet, took off the price tags and told me that my dad didn’t need to know how much it cost. I took this as a lesson from my mom that men don’t understand how much it costs for women to look good (somewhat true), and that my dad is cheap (he is). At least I recognize now that hiding purchases from your spouse is not a good idea (although it is tempting).

My family hosted a foreign exchange student from France for a month when I was 16. That fall, I got a part-time job at the grocery store and began saving money so I could stay with her family the following summer. I saved enough money to cover everything except the $800 plane ticket, so my parents let me borrow the money. When I returned home, I found out the money I had borrowed actually came from my grandparents - my parents had borrowed it from them. I repaid my grandparents, but I felt guilty about it and surprised that my parents didn’t have $800 in the bank. I never asked to borrow money from my parents again.

I have always wanted to live in Chicago, so my junior year, my mom took me there to visit colleges. We went to the University of Chicago and Northwestern, and I fell in love with Northwestern (I didn’t think the University of Chicago seemed like a very fun place because students were outside studying on a Friday evening - shouldn’t they be drinking beer or something?). My parents had never talked to me about paying for college - I just assumed that if I got good grades and test scores, I could get a full-ride scholarship anywhere I wanted. My bubble was quickly burst when I found out Northwestern cost $30,000 per year and didn’t offer academic scholarships. Needless to say, I ended up going to My State U.

My parents made too much money for me to qualify for need-based scholarships or grants, but I had enough merit-based scholarships to cover my base tuition. When we met with the university’s financial aid department, they said that with my scholarships and my parents’ expected contribution (based on some kind of formula), there was only about an $800 shortage per year, and they suggested that my parents find a way to come up with the extra money instead of taking out a loan. Somehow, I left the financial aid office with the maximum allowable student loan. And that, my friends, is where my journey into debt began.

Photo Credit: 1974-12 by jacdupree, used under Creative Commons licensing